What is it that we actually need in life?

What do we actually need in life or in other words what is the purpose of living? Is it to earn a mansion, have a luxurious life style, have people running around you doing errands for you  ? Is this what we are earning for, day in and day out or there is some other purpose of our living? These are some questions that linger in my mind when I see that in today’s world everyone seems to be working for success and a bright future. What that future is no one is clear. Majority of people are either brooding upon their past or worried about the future. Entire world seems to be running after money and material things seeking for happiness, peace and solace in them. In fact, the worth of a person is measured in terms of his position in the job and the amount of material possession he or she has. No one looks for the skills a person has honed about living a truly fruitful life.
The skill of understanding the self and having confidence in one’s own skin is a valuable attribute. A person not wanting to be someone else, free of comparison with others and confident about oneself is actually a rare vision these days. How incredible it is to find someone who is able to solve day to day problems and challenges without getting over whelmed about them. How about being a resilient person who can bend down a little like the birch tree and bounce back as soon as the winds have died down; Quite a metaphor but so true for life. (Birch trees are known for their flexibility, which helps them sway in the wind during a storm. This swaying can be a natural adaptation to prevent damage from strong gusts). For persistence and resilience are essential for achieving real success. Why don’t we value a person’s skill of looking for a solution in face of a challenge more than his riches. What about the incredible treasure of adaptation skills that we can learn for life and stay happy and content always, whatever the circumstance be. Incidence of self-harm, aggression and suicide are increasing at an alarming rate. The contributory trigger can be anything but the actual cause is the lack of resilience in the individuals.

Moreover, human being is a social animal and needs to stay with other people, he cannot survive alone. In the need for companionship and support from other people, humans tend to create relationships. But when we look around, we find all sort of association problems. Relationships are getting ruined for the sake of a surprise gift or a romantic getaway to a costly resort. Wana bees are not looking for a cooperative, empathetic and real partner who can understand others’ emotions but fat pockets and good looks. Nevertheless, good communication skills have been replaced by filtered pictures and chat GPT linguae. Over dependence over the virtual and digital mediums has created a huge void in the lives of today’s youth that they are found fumbling for support and companionship.

If that is not enough, In the world of cheap convenience people are replacing creativity and originality. Deep fake and counterfeit have taken over not only commercial goods but also our life.  Rather than using our own imagination, creativity and knowledge the world is running after the AI to do their work. Forgetting the authentic values of emotions and creations in the process. Value for life as such has been lost in the quest for finding value in goods and commodities of the material world.

 Its high time we give life it’s due respect and place. For this, it is essential that we instil, nurture and bring out the basic life skill in our children and youth. life skills simply put are the skill that a person uses for living a life fully. Ups and downs do come but living a life should not become a permanent challenge. With every failure one learns a new lesson and becomes better at that particular task, for failure can be a valuable learning experience leading to growth and fulfilment. Being equipped with the basic life skills a person can navigate through troubled waters easily. It’s our outlook about life that counts. A positive mindset can help a person to steer through the difficulties of life and find joy in everyday moments. Overcoming the fear of failure is a powerful step towards personal growth and fulfilment. living a meaningful life is not only about living with oneself only, its being able to live in coherence with people. This needs social skills that are nothing but good communication skills, a little bit of empathy, and the knowledge about Interpersonal relationships.  

But when we look around, we find people weary of each other. Ther is an air of distrust, fear and aloofness in relationships. Be it between the couples, in the family or the society as a whole. In fact, the saying goes that trust an animal but not a human.  Really?? Where are we heading as a race? How have we arrived at such a state of affairs. A Century ago, people lived their life well despite innumerable challenges and problems. What has changed now? The most evident one is the family structure! The family which was a treasure house of wisdom and life lessons has shrunken at a fast pace. The joint family fragmented into nuclear families where the dictum was ‘hum do humare do’. Even the government supported it so as to control the population of the country. Children had only their parents to learn th life lessons from. Gradually the family further diminished into nuclear households with double income parents and a single child. Rearing a child in such a setup has become such a mammoth task that young couples are dreading bringing a child into this world and are happy being a ‘pet parent’. I am sufficient for myself and need nobody as partner is also in trend and might become a major reality in the near future. 

In such a grim situation from where would small children emulate living well. Where is the scope for learning life lessons in real time and from real people? Lessons that are crucial for an individuals’ social, mental and emotional growth. Imparting Life skills therefore becomes of paramount importance. Providing life skills lessons to children at school, from the community and family is the need of the hour. For this even the adults need help to enhance their skills as well. Its high time Life skills education is given its due place at Home, in the school curriculum and also the entire education environment. Not only this the community as a whole has to support the school and the children and provide a wholesome learning environment for the new generation.

We need a family that forms the rock for a child, a school that provides opportunities for overall development and the community that gives an enriching and safe environment to a child. So that he/she grows up to be a complete human being capable of living a good life. By having a framework for understanding life, you can navigate the complexities of existence with greater clarity and purpose.

Author : Dr. Kirti Singh Chauhan